But taking your pen for a walk through Chueca is not the same as walking through the cobblestone streets of your town. Where 4G and activist memes arrive... LGBTI discourse does not always permeate.

If you have grown up in a TOWN... you know perfectly well what we are talking about.   

So get ready and buckle up because in this week's post we are going on a rural getaway (the one I was giving you) to address the most hackneyed clichés (which do not make them any less valid) of any self-respecting rustic queer. 

Village faggot: clichés and stages of survival

1. “... the little one from Manoli”

No eres de pueblo si nunca te han interrogado señoras mayores 👵🏼 a punta de “¿y tú de quién eres?”.   

This is what it takes to take root in a place with fewer streets than Monopoly and where genealogy and intrahistory are a more appealing novel. that Coffee with the Scent of a Woman at 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday.   

Therefore, coming out in town... means going out with your whole family, with the neighbors, with the butcher, with those at the bar... and becoming the involuntary crier at the fair.

2. You get Wi-Fi, but not the references

Any teenager from Deep Spain with a half-decent connection has access to all the references and speeches they want to turn their world upside down.   

But LGBT TikTokers don't walk the streets of your town. “There was a sissy who went to the city, there was another who eventually returned to retire…” . You lacked queer friends, bi classmates, boyfriends... mirrors where you could look at yourself and discover yourself like the rest of the kids your age were doing.

3. You collect black backgrounds and photos of naked torsos

And with the sexual awakening and the download of sex apps like 'I'll catch you here and I'll brush you in the garden', a curious rural phenomenon occurs: at greater distances, fewer faces and reliable information.   

I'm very discreet dude..., I don't show photos..., I prefer not to say... nobody knows about me...   

The 'buffet' of the city is nothing like the 'summary and annual menu' (because it also does not change) of the countryside.   And in addition to the number of dishes... they lower the bar by an egg. We are not talking about 'quality'... but about 'danger'; because many end up staying to have sex with some people... and in some haystacks... where the Americans would have already filmed 3 horror movies for you. 

4. In the town, behind closed doors  

Another mantra (quite traditional and folkloric) where intimacy and anonymity are confused... with self-denial.   

You remain silent when someone picks on the sissies on TV, you change the subject when they ask you why you only play with girls, you look the other way when they try to match you with a girlfriend from the next town...   

For not disturbing, so that your mother does not feel ashamed of what they will say, because your grandmother is too old and would not understand... because, in short 'there is no need for anyone in the town to know about you'   And in the end, through silence, you deny and, therefore, you deny yourself.

5. Modern town, city palette

Generalizing (always) there comes a time when you decide to leave town to be; to experiment without the communal eye hovering over your shoulder.   

Until you discover that 'the nearest city' is not the oasis of diversity and inclusion you expected.   

'Red, provincial, town faggot...'   

It's okay that your tinder is enriched, but perhaps not the accessibility to new circles of trust because classist groups and for the most diverse reasons still exist in all neighborhoods.  

6. The town: cage and shelter

Is there a return from rural exile? of the apparent and necessary destination of the flight? Well, unless the wound is serious and still open... always.   

The people know us and protect us.    

He saw us born, grow up, have our first drinks (if it's in a town in Spain, there were probably too many).   

Your people are part of you and you will always be, part of your people. There you meet people you trust, really. There are people there who really know you.   

And although it was a difficult place to wave the flag and discover yourself, perhaps with age you also see everything as more diverse, more relaxed, less arrogant (starting with you).

Como bien dijo Paquita Salas: "Ha habido maricones toda la historia de la humanidad. "The whole HISTORY... Can't there be a faggot even in Puente Viejo?" 

PS: In Siwon we send creams to any town in Spain. Get our Handsomefyer XTRA, for example, to show off the face of a movie star in the Plaza Mayor and the festival.

Handsomefyer XTRA

All-in-1 cream with extra coverage and 'Have you done anything to yourself?' effect.
 Covers pores and wrinkles, moisturizes, evens skin tone and with sunscreen.

We do cool right,
Siwon