Allergy to commitment: we do it… and we see
Friends with benefits, one-night stands, flings, spring rolls, or summer romances…
If labeling your relationships gives you hives, nausea, blurred vision, difficulty breathing, and chest pains…
We have another label… for you: What if you're allergic to commitment?
This week we're taking advantage of the fact that it's the celebration of Singles' DayOr to give you a thorough diagnosis; the MOT for your heart. The psychometric test to see if you're suited to being called "my baby," "my love," or "my little popcorn"... or to have your nightly cheered up by DMs with: "Where are you? I'll send you an Uber."
Ready?
The diagnosis: What is the fear of commitment all about?
The fear of commitment is (surprise, surprise) the panic about everything that love implies = to the butterflies in your stomach from Disney movies, to taking the "next step" in a relationship or simply to connecting emotionally with another person (because this also happens with colleagues and family, not just in a relationship).
Now, a disclaimer is coming…
Although there is nothing more democratic and natural than fear…
The bad part is when that allergy to love, in all its forms, transforms into a phobia that ends up hitting a nerve in the self-love… and that of course it ruins more relationships than Temptation Island.
The symptoms: X-ray of an allergic person at risk
Just as social relationships become more frequent every day fluid and diverse, It is OBVIOUS that not all people who are afraid of commitment are cut from the same cloth.
But if we were to list the most common characteristics, it would look something like this:
- Future plans? We'll see…
- Level 'L' in conflict management.
- They live on a daily emotional roller coaster.
- As for making decisions… he doesn't know, he doesn't answer, NEXT.
- They are terrified of losing their freedom and independence.
- Tendency towards jealousy and control due to fear of abandonment.
- They sweat profusely to manage and express their emotions.
- Her most faithful companion in all her relationships: insecurity.
- Conspiracy theories: they think that something is always going to go wrong.
- It's not love... what you feel is an obsession with the courtship and flirting phase: forever hooked on pre-twerking.
The reasons: why are we reluctant to commit?
Through evolution, statistics, and biology
It is inevitable that there will be more and more single people in the world. We don't say it We, and people who know what they're talking about, say so. I swear.
Trying to escape this is like trying to escape pollen in spring.
Because of traditions that smell of mothballs.
Is fidelity the pinnacle of commitment? Is monogamy the only way to form lasting relationships? Is marriage for life the ultimate "if only"?
We deserve to turn the page of those ideas that are more outdated than textured paint.
For a catalog of fears that even Netflix on Halloween can't match.
Fear of losing our freedom, of losing future opportunities, of losing "the love of your life". Fear of reliving Past and painful experiences. Fear that things won't turn out as you expected. Fear of intimacy with someone and showing vulnerability…
In summary? Fear of leaving us all the fears that don't fit on this list.
Because matches are not what they used to be.
Although dating apps can be great for finding love or meeting someone your trusted Tinderfuck…The polar cold of black backgrounds, the headless body shots, or the “If I slept with you, I don’t remember.” Nobody can take it away from you.
Have we all hooked up thanks to Tinder? Yes. Have we occasionally missed out on a super match at suspicious hours of the night? Maybe. Is finding love on an app stressful? You should know.
Dr. Siwon's recipe for making peace with commitment
Obligations, agreements, demands… Don't you like the definition of commitment you've been told so far? Well, switch to one that matches you.
That's what commitment is all about, isn't it? Building something with someone honestly, but always on your own terms: expectations, complicity, intimacy (💦), mutual respect, that you know each other inside and out…
So…
● If you're into the whole "meeting people in the deep web" thing, even if your Tinder profile is more like the deep web...
● If you're #FuckingOut about being single and enjoying life in #AllTheSingleLadies mode…
● If you're more into cuddling than random skewers…
Antihistamine and plenty of water.
Have a great time during the process and twerk as much as you can (and want to), Maybe your thing with commitment started as a forbidden love… and will end as a love for life.
P.S:And as RuPaul says: if you can't give yourself self-love, how are you going to love the rest of the gang?
Well, maybe it wasn't like that, but the idea is the same:
Before you start handing out heart and eggplant emojis, give yourself a shot of self-love with our Handsomefyer Xtra to leave you with a face that stirs passions, hearts, and whatever else arises wherever it goes.
Handsomefyer Xtra
all-in-one cream with effect Have you put anything on yourself?
We do cool right,
Siwon
